


Let's Pretend

by Mrs12A



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:00:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28435026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mrs12A/pseuds/Mrs12A
Summary: Second OS collection which, contrary to my first one, will not take over the existing scenes. So it will be various OS, on the universe of the series or modern version. Bellamy and CLarke will still be in the center but it is also possible that other characters will be focused on.
Relationships: Bellamy Blake & Clarke Griffin, Bellamy Blake & Octavia Blake, Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin, Clarke - Relationship, Octavia Blake & Clarke Griffin
Kudos: 5





	Let's Pretend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So my first OS in this collection will be a Christmas one! I wasn't very excited at first and then finally, the words came on their own! 
> 
> So it's happening on Sanctum, season 6, the first episodes happened but everything went fine in the end. No chip stories, no threats. They found peace and a quiet life awaits them.But Clarke and Bellamy are not as close as they used to be and Clarke feels useless and alone during this festive period... She discovers a new talent and reveals her feelings in a strange way... And what if Bellamy actually has a wonderful surprise in store for her?
> 
> The songs used are:
> 
> Christmas Baby Please Come Home de U2  
> Britney Spears - My Only Wish (This Year)  
> All I want for Christmas is You de Mariah Carey
> 
> and
> 
> Have yourself a merry little Christmas
> 
> Enjoy!

Garlands, glitter, joy on every street corner ... If someone had told me, when our lives were once again threatened a few weeks ago, well a few hundred years if I count those we spent asleep, that I would have the opportunity to see, to participate in a Christmas party almost like those my father told me when I was a child ... I would not have believed it! And yet here I am, sitting on the steps of the sumptuous Sanctum Palace, watching the inhabitants busy decorating every piece of the village, every window of their houses... It warms my heart and I must admit that I need it. Without anything or anyone to save, I feel... empty.

It's been a few weeks since we landed on planet Alpha, actually named Sanctum by its residents, the name of the village they built around a magnificent palace. It was a difficult start, but we were eventually accepted by the village chief, Russell, and the majority of his people. We finally agreed to stay here...did we really have a choice? I don't think so. Nevertheless, we still haven't woken up everyone on our ship, realizing that we couldn't abuse the hospitality of our hosts.It's therefore been several weeks that we've been doing everything possible to build our own village, a few dozen kilometers away from it, so as not to disturb them for too long.

The construction has progressed well, Raven has almost finished the technical part and we have set up an irrigation system for the land so that we can grow our own food and bring water to our future homes. But it's not nearly finished yet. And we had to put all this on standby...

Yes, because here on Sanctum, the Christmas period is holy and traditions must be respected. Only vital tasks must be done, otherwise everyone must rest, have a good time, and enjoy this festive period. And the least we can do is to respect that too. To top it all off, we're really not used to doing nothing, and when some people enjoy this peace and quiet, I carry it on my shoulders like an umpteenth burden.

It's strange not to feel the weight of the world on me anymore. The last time I had this feeling was when I found Madi after the Praimfaya ... We spent 6 years in peace, just the two of us ... But it was clearly not the same. Firstly, because I had to raise Madi who was still a child and there were many things to do, including rebuilding our little village to welcome the return of my friends... Secondly, because I was looking forward to Bellamy's return and I saw a bright future ahead of me...

No, today it's really not like that ... Madi is a teenager now and she hardly seems to need my presence anymore ... Spending most of her day with her friends, and I'm happy for her, I'm happy to see her fulfilled here, that's all I wanted ... Bellamy acts strangely with me, less coldly than the others, of course, but distant ... Our relationship is not like before and I think it will never be the same again.I feel like he's avoiding me. I'm not even talking about Raven, Echo and Emori who look at me like a lightning bolt whenever I'm around. I gave up seeking their forgiveness a long time ago. Echo wasn't so aggressive with me when we woke up from cryo, but now she's the one who's acting the meanest to me. If she could throw sharp blades at me with her eyes, she probably would.

Curiously, Murphy seems, however, to have finished pouring his hatred on me. I can't say he's my best friend either, but he's the one who shows me the most kindness and understanding. Well, if by kindness you mean throwing stupid jokes at me every time he comes across me... But I guess it's John Murphy's way of being kind, and I have to admit that his taunting makes me feel good. I feel that there is no more nastiness in it now. No doubt he has understood that my intentions have never been bad?

My mother spends her time in the library and with Russell, desperately searching for a solution to save Kane, put back in cryo ... I don't dare to tell her that I think it's a waste of time. I don't think she would recover and I can understand that it will take time for her to accept it, especially after all she has been through.

Indra and Gaia are the only ones who really show me a minimum of attention, but I think it's mostly about Madi... They don't have any animosity towards me, but I don't feel particularly close to them for all that. And as grounders, they don't like to hang out with the people of Sanctum, still perplexed about their customs.

Finally, and as surprising as it may be, the only person I really feel comfortable with these days is Octavia ... Amazing isn't it?

Octavia came back several dozen days after Bellamy left her in the woods.Bellamy gave her one last chance to repent and she was able to return to Sanctum. However, we cannot say that our people are happy about it, everyone distrusts her, puts her aside, and even if Bellamy seems to have forgiven her, it is still very cold between them and he avoids her as much as he can.

So we find ourselves two outcasts, she and I. I can see that she is trying to move forward and give the best of herself, just like me. And above all, she and I understand each other. I don't know if it's our past mistakes that brought us together or being pushed aside by Bellamy, but that's the way it is. So it was at her side that I worked in the construction of our village, without feeling obligated to enter into big conversations, but simply at ease with her presence .

I still don't understand why Bellamy put distance between us, yet he seemed to have totally forgiven me without even asking and our last embrace at the lantern ceremony seemed really intense, special. I felt a spark, even passion.I can't understand why everything turned upside down so quickly... Was it my bond with Cylian that night that he didn't like? I confess that I did it on purpose to be so adventurous with this stranger under the gaze of the only man who makes my heart beat. Deep down, I wanted to make him jealous, or at least try to see if he was jealous, discreetly watch his reaction. It's petty I know, but seeing him every day with Echo twists my guts and if he had even a small part of the feelings I have for him, I wanted to take revenge gently, to make him understand that I wouldn't wait for him forever ... And seeing the result, either I succeeded more than I should have, or I made him angry, or it's something else even worse ... The worst thing is that I didn't do anything with this doctor. He tried, of course, but I walked away at the last moment, feeling like I was cheating that part of me that belongs to someone else, my heart, my soul ... no matter what time of my life I am at, I sincerely believe that I could give up everything to be there for him when he needs me, when he is ready. Because his love left its mark on me hundreds of years ago, and it is everlasting. But for now, this man is bound to another woman...

Sometimes I think it's better this way ... I don't want to be "the other girl" again, like I was with Finn and Raven, even though there's nothing comparable here. I didn't know about Raven at the time and I was having fun with Finn, I was still young. I had fallen under his spell, but I wasn't in love with him, no... But with Bellamy, it's much more than love, it's an inexplicable feeling that runs through me and makes me vibrate. He is the one who gives me the definition of this complex word. He struck me tenderly in my heart. I know that he is the one, my soul mate... Unfortunately, I realized it too late. But we both had things to live, things to learn and things to do to be the people we are today. I think he loved me before, when I couldn't see anything, when I repressed my feelings, when I wasn't ready... But today, when he has bonded with another, I'm not so sure anymore, even though his gaze is even more intense than before... And I have no right to break what he has built, I shouldn't even try. And yet I feel like throwing myself into his arms as soon as he appears in my sight. The wounds of the past, the thousand and one twists and turns I have taken in my life, the work I've done on myself, the little flame of hope I've always tried to keep alive, and the little internal voice that is sometimes hard to listen to, that told me that everything would be put in place when the time came, it all makes sense now, it all leads me inexorably towards him. I wouldn't have been who I am without all this, and I know that I would go through the darkest paths and the most difficult moments again and again if I had to go through it all again to get to him.

But it's his friendship that I have to be content with, and even that, I feel like I don't have it anymore...

I tried to find out more, of course. I tried to talk to him on the rare occasions when I found him alone and around, because most of the time, he's just not there, even in the construction of the village, he's often out of my sight... But, he just smiles at me and tells me that everything is fine, that he's just very busy at the moment... If that's his excuse, it's really bad!We've always been extremely busy and we always found time to get together, to talk... No, I know it's different now.

I've been fishing for news on Murphy's side too, as he's one of the few who doesn't seem to want my head at the end of a spade... But he answered me very mysteriously that he didn't want to go in there and that it wasn't up to him to tell me anything, that we were both his friends (yes coming out of Murphy's mouth, it was special to hear that word), and that he preferred that we take care of it by ourselves. He just ended up telling me not to worry... Especially since he's the one I see most often with Bellamy and even disappears with him from time to time. They are hiding something from me for sure! And I'm far too morally exhausted to keep searching...I just have to be patient and wait...hoping that our relationship will return to normal, at the very least.

As for Octavia, she is barely speaking to her brother so she is not the one who will be able to help me. But at least I have someone to confide in.

So it is in this half-festive, half-glacial atmosphere that I find myself on the stairs of the Palace... brooding when I should be celebrating, and above all at peace. I watch Madi playing soccer with her friends, she bursts out laughing and I suddenly tell myself that her happiness must come before mine, it must be enough for me... I must stop moping. But that's much easier said than done when all my thoughts go to a head with a brown curly head and a devastating voice.

Speaking of voices, it's young Blake's voice that's coming out of my thoughts:

« **Hey** »

« **Hey** »

She sits next to me...

« **Don't you participate to the decorations?** » She asks me while knowing the answer very well.

« **Neither do you.** » I simply remark.

She lets out a little smile ... « **Nope, honestly, I don't feel comfortable with all this euphoria. I feel like the dark year was only a few months ago and I have to tell you that I don't know how to handle this sudden change for me. We may well want to repent, there are things that will remain engraved in us forever ...** »

« **Tell me about it.** » I blew.

« **You look as excited as I am ... You don't look as excited about Christmas as I am.** ».

« **No, it's not that... I'm happy for Madi, for our people, really. I didn't think I'd live in a moment like this, I'd lost hope. For me, Christmas was a legend, a children's tale that my parents used to tell me at night, in memory of what their own parents who had been lucky enough to live it told them...and even if it's a bit different here, I'm happy, sincerely.** »

« **But ?** »

« **But, I don't know. I feel useless! Since I was a teenager I've always had responsibilities on my back. When I arrived on Earth, it was getting worse and worse and I sincerely felt like I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders, trying to do my best despite my mistakes and reproaches. I didn't have a minute to myself, but I felt useful. Now... I feel like I'm useless, I'm bored!** »

She looked at me, understanding, it's crazy how she looks like her brother sometimes... « **Hum... I see, I was responsible for our people for only 6 years and I have the same feeling. But I'm getting to know you, we're not so different, you and I, it took me a long time to realize it, but it's clear now, we may have wanted to kill each other several times, but you're the one who resembles me the most, whom I feel closest to, and I know that's not all... Something else grieves you.** »

« **You're right... I feel... alone, incomplete. I mean, I know I probably deserved it...** »

« **Not as much as me.** » She cut me off.

« **Don't say that, we've all made mistakes, the main thing is to realize it and improve...that's what Monty wanted. You're doing very well, believe me. I trust you Octavia. Of all the people here, you are one of the only ones I would entrust Madi to if I had to ...** »

« **I'm sincerely honored... But I'm not hiding the fact that it surprises me, I would have rather thought that you would choose Bell...** »

She watched for my gaze, throwing me the line a little too obviously. I smiled, because I know where she wants to lead... Octavia is smart.

« **It's apparently not so easy between us anymore...** » My heart tightens as I pronounce this obviousness.

« **What does that mean? There is no more fusional than the two of you!Sometimes it makes you wonder how your mind can be in two different bodies.** »

Funny, I sometimes think exactly the same thing.

« **Can't you see anything? He constantly avoids me, Ii told me that he forgave me, I felt extremely close to him the few days after we landed, but since then, he is as cold as an iceberg, impossible to have a conversation with him... And the worst of all, I don't know if the problem is mine or his! He doesn't seem to be like that just with me. Of course he is with you, he seems to have a hard time letting go of the Bloodreina episode, but I'm sure he'll get over it when he realizes how much you've evolved. But apart from maybe Murphy and the attention he allows himself towards Madi, he seems to be like that with everyone ...** »

She raises her eyes to the sky, seeming to reflect...

« **Quite the contrary, Clarke, I see everything! I see everything since you got off that damn ladder and yelled at him not to open the dropship door. I see everything since you jumped into his arms when you escaped from Mount Weather. I see everything since you abandoned him for 3 months and he was just a shadow of his former self. I see everything since you let him open the bunker door to save me. I see everything since I know you called him for 6 years every day. And finally, I see everything since he didn't hesitate to poison me to save your life, since you let him rot in that fighting pit where I almost killed him, but he forgave you faster than the blink of an eye when he is unable to do the same for me, his own sister.** »

I'm stuffed and dazed. I feel like Octavia has wanted to have this conversation with me for a long time, but am I ready to listen? She continues:

« **The bond that unites you is really special, unique... I'm almost jealous of it. I don't think I've ever known that, even with Lincoln, and yet he was the only man I really loved... You are soulmates. The universe tries hard to keep you apart, but it always finds a way to bring you together. You have been through so much together. Honestly, I think that your bond may be invisible, but it is indestructible and nothing can separate you. You're just too stubborn to admit it, or too cowardly.Everyone can see that love radiates from each of you when you are together... Except you!** »

« **Octavia …** »

« **No, let me finish! My brother is madly in love with you Clarke, and even though I admit I haven't always understood why... I can see that you are good for each other, and that you are pathetic when you are taken away! I know my brother, and I know without a doubt that Bellamy has never loved anyone but you, maybe even more than me, his own sister... He has gotten bogged down in this relationship with Echo, but it's obvious that he doesn't feel a quarter of what he feels for you. He wouldn't have been convinced that you were dead, he would never have let Echo into his life. But he's a loyal person, and unless it comes from her, he'll never admit it, and he won't put you through what you went through with Finn ...** »

I look down.

« **But the only question I ask myself is: do you really love him? I already know the answer, but I want to hear it from you.** »

« **I ... Yes, of course I do. It wasn't obvious from the start, and yet this feeling has always been there, deep inside me. And that's probably why I feel so lonely at this time when everyone is happy with their loved ones. I miss him and it's like I'm running out of air. I need him, in every way I can, but at least I need his friendship.** »

« **Thank you for being honest with me.It wasn't so hard to admit, was it? I guess I'm the first one to hear it in your own voice?** »

« **Well, Madi suspects it, she often alludes to me, but I never managed to tell her for fear that she might want to play matchmaker. After all, she's the one who's been yapping about the daily calls. So yes, you're the first one. And I have to admit that it feels good to finally put into words how I feel... But... what am I going to do? I don't want to go through what happened with Raven and Finn again, no way. Besides, everyone hates me enough already!** »

« **I can't believe I'm going to give you this shitty advice, but... give it time. Unfortunately, it's the only thing you can do at this point. But I reassure you, I'm convinced that the wheel will soon turn in your favor, after all the sacrifices you've made, which I understand today... You deserve it, and so does he.** »

She gets up and puts a hand on my shoulder ... « **I must leave you, Indra is bored as much as you are, I promised to go to train with her, discreetly of course. Stop being a Grinch, try to put some of that Christmas magic in your heart ... Who knows, will the magic work in the end ?** »

She walks away leaving me there with the weight of this conversation that doesn't burden me that much ... In fact, I feel lighter ...

After about ten minutes, I get up in my turn and go to the main room where several people are at the table, happily sipping their mulled wine, while others are polishing the wall decorations so that everything is ready for the big Christmas Eve buffet ...

I scan the room with my eyes, and my gaze instinctively lands on the back table, where I see Murphy chatting with Bellamy, who looks at me strangely. But his eyes quickly flee from me when he realizes that I am staring at him. I can't go to them. I don't want to be out of place.

I turn around and try not to look too dumb, because that's how I feel ... Stupid and weak ... stupid not to allow myself to walk across this room to talk to my best friend, because that's what he is after all. My presence disturbs him and I can't stand it. I look at the rest of the room and my eyes linger on the big piano which is in the corner... An old man plays a beautiful melody that brings back beautiful memories... My father used to play the piano, he even taught me and we spent many evenings he and I singing while playing this so melodious instrument. That was a lifetime ago. And even though I haven't laid my hands on such an instrument for years, my mind imagines myself walking my fingers on the polished wood...I never had time to play in Arkadia, and anyway, no way to touch what came from Mount Weather.... But here, it's different. I look one last time at Bellamy who, once again, flees from my gaze as he was laying on top of me. I may not be able to talk to him, but...what if my music allows me to communicate what cannot come out otherwise?????

I walk towards the piano and the old man seems to guess my intentions. He finishes his melody and delicately leaves me the place with a big smile that comforts me. But as I take my seat on the bench, fear overwhelms me. What if I don't know how to play anymore? What if I lost my faculties and made a fool of myself? But why the hell did I sit there? Where the hell was my head????

I close my eyes and take a deep breath, thinking about my father, his smile, the songs we used to sing during Christmas, there are so many of them ... I used to love singing those songs, some childish, some more romantic, it's those songs that are on the tip of my lips, those are the ones I want to interpret ... my mind quickly drifts towards Bellamy and several songs come to my mind...

I take a few more breaths and put my worn-out fingers on the black and white keys.

_Pretty lights on the tree_

_I'm watching 'em shine_

_You should be here with me_

_Baby please come home_

_If there was a way_

_I'd hold back these tears_

_But it's Christmas day_

_Baby please come home_

I come out of my trance with dozens of applause. I played this song without thinking, as the words came out of my mouth with an ease I could not have guessed...it's incredible that I still remember after all these years. I don't dare look at Bellamy, I don't know if he's still there ... all I know is that he was with me every note played, in my heart, in my thoughts ...

« **Another one!!!** » People are shouting...

I think I just discovered a talent other than drawing.

Another one? Yes of course, I don't hesitate a minute. It's like a release for me. Singing what I can't say... I'm not doing anything wrong, am I?

_Last night I took a walk in the snow._

_Couples holding hands, places to go_

_Seems like everyone but me is in love._

_Santa can you hear me_

_I signed my letter that I sealed with a kiss_

_I sent it off_

_It just said this_

_I know exactly what I want this year._

_Santa can you hear me._

_I want my baby (baby, yeah)_

_I want someone to love me someone to hold me._

The song ends again without me realizing it, a blissful smile on my lips. How good it feels!The applause is even louder, I see new people in the room... I smile shyly and stand up to leave my place when a little girl grabs my wrist tenderly...

« **Please, just one last...** »

« How to refuse something to such a pretty face? A last one then, and I want you to stay next to me. » I said to her nicely.

I sit down under the encouragement of my ... Audience?

One last song...let's see, the one that is closest to my heart, the one I was afraid to sing... The one that... Yes, I take this little piece of courage that I just found and turn my face towards this table in the back... I see Murphy applauding with his hands up...and whistling! Yes, whistling! Just like Murphy! And Bellamy doesn't escape my gaze, no, not this time, on the contrary, he seems to be frozen, dazed... a slight smirk stretching the corner of his cheek, almost imperceptibly if I didn't know each of his features so well... That's the motivation I need.

I might go too far, but that's all right. It's Christmas after all.

_I don't want a lot for Christmas_

_There's just one thing I need_

_I don't care about presents_

_Underneath the Christmas tree_

_I just want you for my own_

_More than you could ever know_

_Make my wish come true..._

_All I want for Christmas_

_Is you…_

_Make my wish come true_

_Baby all I want for Christmas is_

_You…_

And there, at that moment, as I let my voice pursue these last verses, I plunge my gaze into that of the gorgeous dark-haired man who brings to life every cell of my body and I hold it until the last note. A link is forged between us, our souls read each other, just as before... That's all I wanted.

The room is full now and there is a real thunderous applause! An other brunette takes its place in front of the piano with a big smile: Octavia.

« **Well, you've been hiding that from us! Wow, it was... Amazing! And... powerful ...you chose the song by chance or... not obviously!** »

She laughs softly as she sits beside me ...

« **It obviously made you feel better, you are much more radiant than earlier! Will you teach me? Maybe it will be good for me too!** »

« **If you want... what kind of Christmas carols do you know? To stay within the theme.** »

« **Uh... actually it's going to go fast, I only know one, the one Bellamy used to sing to me when I was little, _Have yourself a merry little Christmas_ , do you know it ?** »

« **Of course! It is perfect!It's one of my favorites...let's go! Tonight, Wanheda and Skairipa will warm the hearts!** »

My joke made her burst out laughing and I confess that I did too. I feel much better now ... relaxed.

_Have yourself a merry little Christmas_

_Let your heart be light_

_Next year all our troubles will be out of sight_

_Have yourself a merry little Christmas_

_Make the yuletide gain_

_Next year all our troubles will be miles away_

_Once again as in olden days_

_Happy golden days of yore_

_Faithfull friends who are near to us_

_Will be dear to us_

_Once more_

_Somedays soon we all will be together_

_If the fates allow_

_Until then we'll have tomorrows through somehow_

_So have yourself a merry little Christmas, now_

I have to say that our voices were in perfect harmony with each other. It was strange how I felt like I was on the ark, next to my family, singing with them. Because in the end, I always considered Octavia to be my family, even though we fought like sisters at times, it never stopped me from loving her and feeling connected to her. 

We hug each other in front of the audience and I can't help but think about her big brother, in the back of the room ... What would he think?

I discreetly turn my gaze towards him. He whispers something to Murphy and gets up, I think he's coming towards us.

I detach myself from Octavia and we get up to give way to the piano, too many emotions for today!

We move away from the piano and find ourselves in front of Bellamy, who looks at us strangely, a new gleam of emotion in his eyes... Octavia smiles awkwardly at him and in a few milliseconds, he takes her in his arms. He hugged her so tightly that I am almost embarrassed to witness such an intimate scene. But at the same time, I am happy for them, for him, for her. Christmas is the perfect day to forgive and to be close to your loved ones. These two deserve a fresh start!

Octavia holds on to him as I have done so many times...I smile, really happy to be reunited with them, and then turn around to leave the room. But suddenly, a grip that I know well grabs my arm... « **Wait!** »

HIS voice, this voice that makes me shudder ...

He releases Octavia and tells her:« **I'll see you later okay ... I'm glad my sister is really back!** »

« **I love you big brother, I won't disappoint you this time.** »

« **I know O, I love you too!** »

Octavia winks at me then leaves me with her brother...

« **You're... it was... wow Clarke! I got goosebumps and I'm not the only one! You're really talented! I knew you were good at a lot of things, but that ...** »

« **If you only knew!** » I say to him awkwardly while realizing the different interpretations that there can be to my answer... The truth is that I don't know what else to say.

« **I ... Would you like to go for a walk with me? I have something to show you. I had to wait until Christmas Day, but I think now is the right time ...** »

« **Uh .... All right.** » He leads me through the crowd, his hand gently descending from the top of my arm to my hand, his fingers intertwining mine. Until a few weeks ago, I wouldn't have been surprised by such a gesture from him, but after the distance he has put between us, I am both filled with joy and truly questioning. Why such a turnaround on his part? Why now?

I'm following him without asking any questions, first because I'm dying to be alone with him, but also because I want to know what he has been hiding from me all this time.

So we leave the village, our hands still intertwined, without saying a word. I see my mother in the distance, she smiles at me, she too I haven't seen her smile for a long time. And as I turn one last time towards the palace, I meet Murphy's mischievous gaze, who winks at me, thumbs up ... I look up at the sky ... He knows something, it's obvious! And he has the ability to play with my nerves while having fun!That's John Murphy's talent!

We take the direction of the village we are building...I recognize the road.

As we enter the dense forest, he is the one who breaks the silence and I didn't expect that asking myself this question would make my blood run cold: « **These songs, you were singing them for me, weren't you?** »

He doesn't look at me and continues to move forward as if nothing had happened, his hand still in mine, allowing me to feel a little quiver on his side. Has this question escaped him? Should I tell him the truth or continue to hide it from him????

« **Bellamy ... I ... Where is Echo ?** » You could say that I have a gift for throwing a cold in the worst moments. But Echo remains the only reason that keeps me from telling him the truth.

« **I don't know. We broke up since the homecoming dance.** » He says this as if he had just told me that it would not rain today, nonchalantly.

« **Oh. What? How? Why didn't I know about this?** » How the hell did I not realize this? That's the real question! Their room is right next to mine and I didn't notice anything! Probably because I was so disgusted to see them going to bed in the same room that I took care to go to bed before them and to sleep in so I wouldn't see them getting up together...but, why?... Oh fuck, I can't believe it! I don't know if I should worry or jump for joy, or be sad for my friend ... He doesn't look sad anyway. Distant yes, weird yes, but sad no. And that would explain Echo's icy look at me. But I didn't do anything to her, did I ?

« **I ... That's just the way it is, it had to come to this anyway. I knew that my relationship with her was doomed to failure the moment I saved you from Diyoza with that mug in my hand. I was probably too much a coward to hurt her feelings and tell her the truth. But she's a spy, you know! She is far from being stupid! I think she's always known that deep down inside... And that night, when she saw my reaction when I saw you dancing with that damn doctor... That must have been the last straw for her. She deserves better and she knows it. I think she's still a little resentful, but I'm sure she'll get over it. She has a good heart. And I am relieved and free...** »

I stop short and let go of his hand: « **Are you seriously telling me it's my fault?** »

« **No, well, yes, but not directly! You had nothing to do with it!I even made sure to put some distance between us so that you wouldn't feel guilty, and so as not to hurt her, to give her time to acclimatize. Even she is aware of what I really want.** »

« **And what do you actually want?** »

« **The same as you, I think ... so answer my question, we're almost there, were those songs for me?** »

« **Of course it did.** »

There I said it, it wasn't so complicated after all.

He smiled sincerely at me, visibly as relieved as I was. Finally, there is no more discomfort between us. But I still need to relax a little bit.

« **Bellamy, are you going to tell me where you're taking me now? Are you going to bury me alive in the wood?** »

« **Hmm, it's a tempting idea, but no, I won't survive it and you know it!I'll take you to our place.** »

« **We turned much too early, the new village was straight ahead!** »

« **I didn't mention the village ... Close your eyes and let yourself be guided, we are almost there ...** »

He puts his hands over my eyes and stands behind me to guide my steps... I feel his breath against my neck and the cold is in no way responsible for the shivers that run through my body. My heart beats a thousand miles an hour.

We take a few more steps and he finally stops, takes his hands off my face and steps back, to my sorrow.

« **You can open your eyes.** » He whispers in my ear ... Does he fucking realize the effect he's having on me ???? Get a grip, Clarke!

It takes a while for my eyesight to acclimatize to the light, but it takes even longer to realize what I find in front of me: A nice cottage, quite big compared to the small houses I had in Shallow Valley, in front of a beautiful little lake where swan-like animals are strolling ... It's beautiful ... and really romantic!

« **Welcome to your home...Welcome to our home.** »

« **At our home? It's ... it's splendid ...!** »

« **Glad you like it! I literally spent my days and nights building this little peaceful haven for you Princess, for us, if you will. I have to admit that Murphy helped me a lot, but I built most of this house with my own hands. I'm pretty proud of it.** »

His devastating smile illuminating his face, I want to throw myself to his lips...

« **So that's what you were up to while I was wondering where you were... I think you were avoiding me!** »

« **It was actually the case, I didn't want you to follow me and find out about this place before it was ready. And then, after I broke up with Echo… but believe me, I fought against myself to stay away from you. It wasn't easy when every fiber of my body was calling out for you...** »

I turn around, tears in my eyes, tears of happiness, of ecstasy even ... The long-awaited moment has finally arrived, at last I think ... What if I misinterpreted the situation?

« **Do you want us to live here together?** » I clearly formulate the question so as not to leave any doubt, I need to hear it from him.

« **The house is quite big yes, I made 4 bedrooms... Just in case. Madi will have her own of course, and if you want me to, I would like to occupy one of them...or better yet, I would like to share yours.** »

I let out a big smile of satisfaction and he continues. I have the feeling that if he stops he won't be able to tell me what he wants.

« **I think we've wasted enough time Clarke, what I'm about to tell you, I've never told anyone but Octavia: I love you Clarke . I love you more than anything in this universe. You are the only one who knows me by heart and my soul reads yours like a book. We didn't find each other, we found each other, I know it, I feel it, and I think you do too. When I heard you sing tonight, I had the confirmation that I was missing to finally take that tiny step that defines our relationship. You are my best friend, my soul mate, my half, the missing piece of my puzzle, the reason my heart is beating. I don't want to spend another day away from you. I want to fall asleep every night against you and be woken up every morning by your caresses, I want to be like a father to Madi and I want to make you lots of other children who will have your pretty eyes in which I dream of drowning...if you want, this is our home here, in the new shield, but not too close to the others so that we can have our tranquility, our intimacy, and not too far from Sanctum so that Madi can join her friends more easily... I hope you like it.** ».

I am flabbergasted, in seventh heaven. I feel like it's a dream, but if it is a dream, it's devilishly realistic!I move closer to him and put my arms around his neck. This time there is nothing platonic or friendly about this gesture, it has never been the case anyway, but here I clearly reveal my intentions as I answer him mischievously:

« **I don't know which part I like the most...the one where you built me a house almost alone, the one where you finally tell me that you love me, the one where you tell me that you want to make me a lot of children... Frankly I hesitate....** »

He looks at me with a smile on his face, understanding that I am teasing him...

« **Bellamy, I don't just want to tell you that I love you, because I've said it before and those words sounded wrong yet I really understand what it means to be with you. What we have between us is precious. I need you in my life, in my heart. In fact, I only need you to be happy and fulfilled. You're right, we've wasted far too much time. So yes, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, here or elsewhere I don't care, as long as we are together for good. I won't let you go, Bellamy Blake!** »

« **That's the answer I was hoping for... I'm glad I didn't wait for Christmas... We can then celebrate our first real Christmas, together...** »

« **This will be the most wonderful Christmas I'm sure!My parents always told me that that's what's important at Christmas, being with the ones you love, it's not about garlands or decorations, no, it's just about being together...it makes all the sense today.** »

I move closer to his mouth to do what has haunted me for more than a century... but he moves away.

« **Wait... Not yet! Come on...** »

He drags me to the house and opens the door. Then he takes a quick step inside and captures my lips with his, sealing our confession with the most passionate kiss I've ever received. It's an amazing connection that I feel then, I can feel love invading my entire being. I could spend my life kissing Bellamy Blake, and in fact, I plan to do so...

We step aside to catch our breath ...

He points to the top of the door with his finger.

« **Mistletoe? Seriously ???** » I laugh ... He thought of everything!

« **Actually it's Murphy's idea.** »

« **Murphy ?** »

« **Believe it or not, he is very excited at the idea that, I quote "the king and princess move into their castle together and live happily ever after" ... Imagine that he said that in a petty way, of course.** »

« **The spitting image of Murphy!** »

« **Well, now I'm going to show you your castle ...my Princess. Because if I lay my lips on yours, I'm afraid I won't be able to get off.** » It's been hundreds of years since he's called me that, I love that nickname when it comes out of his mouth.

« **I have a much better idea. But first, if you want, as there are still two rooms available, I would like Octavia to move in with us if she wishes, at least until she has made other bonds with the others?** »

« **Great idea! I love the fact that you two have gotten closer together! Thank you for being there for her when I didn't feel like I could.** »

« **The pleasure was mine ... I needed her just as much recently. And she has really matured!She wants to become better! She already is.** »

He nods and smiles…

« **Now, will you bother to enter our humble dwelling? How do we begin the tour? Didn't you have an idea in mind before you told me about my sister?** »

« **If I only had one... I've had over a century to imagine all the things I could do with you, the list is long! But first, why don't you show me around our room? I'd like to test the bed if you don't mind...** » I said to him with a smile full of subtext so that he understands my intentions.

« **Obviously! And believe me Princess, Christmas is only tomorrow night ... I have all the time in the world to have you test every room in the house by then. I also have a lot of ideas in my head and I don't think I have enough life at your side to implement them all.** »

He closes the door while taking me in his arms and kissing me with a consuming fever...This Christmas looks really wonderful. I am totally in love with Bellamy Blake, and I finally have confirmation that it is mutual.I now belong to him body and soul.

I know that our future will be bright because together we are invincible and this time nothing will stand in the way of our happiness.


End file.
